By now, everyone knows Christmas is based on pagan traditions. You’re most likely even pretty familiar with Krampus by now. Thanks internet!
Of course, there are probably already half a billion blogs floating around about all the creepy Christmas traditions that so many people have forgotten about, so I’m not going to write another one. But you definitely should google it. It’s a great rabbit hole. However, if you can’t handle an internet time suck right now, because Christmas chaos and such, I still recommend at least reading this article from Smithsonian that talks about the history of telling ghost stories during this time of year. Yay ghost stories!
In any case, what I really want to talk about is how we can bring back the original spookiness of the season. Sure, you could sit around and tell ghost stories like they did before TV, but let’s be honest. Most people under 30 aren’t going to listen unless you record it and upload it to YouTube first.
So, how do we make Christmas creepy again? I have some ideas…
- You know that annoying elf? The one parents stress over moving every night? Sure you do. So now, do that. Only, instead of using the licensed one, go buy the creepiest thrift store doll you can find, and don’t tell anyone in your house that you bought it. Also, if they ask, deny that you have any idea where it came from. Do you live alone? Sneak it into a friend’s house instead.
- Get a live Christmas tree. They’re filled with insects, which will wake up from their winter dormancy and infest your warm, cozy home. Maybe. Or so I’ve heard. But still definitely tell this to everyone you know who has a live tree. Bonus points if you heard about a friend of a friend who went to the hospital with a terrible ringing in his ear and a splitting headache, only to find out an earwig crawled out of the tree and burrowed into his ear.
- Do you prefer not lying to your friends and family? Well, it won’t be as exciting, but there are a TON of holiday themed horror movies available for your viewing pleasure. Check out this nowhere-near-complete list. It’s an odd collection of new and old, big budget and low budget, popular and indie.
- The Nightmare before Christmas
- Krampus
- Black Christmas
- Gremlins
- A Christmas Horror Story
- Anna and the Apocalypse
- Silent Night, Deadly Night
- Shelved
Do you have a favorite holiday horror movie or creepy tradition? Let me know in the comments!
